Guys like to think that they are studs. While some certainly fit the definition, many guys are right out to lunch when it comes knowing what women want when they’re in the sack. Just because you are well endowed doesn’t mean that your woman will be turned on and just because you don’t have too much down there doesn’t mean that you can’t drive a woman wild. All men have different tastes when it comes to the deed. What turns one guy on might not do anything for the next guy. Some dudes want to be blindfolded and handcuffed to the bedposts whereas other guys would feel too vulnerable and not enjoy the experience.
Women are no different. They have their individual likes and their dislikes when it comes to making love. The important thing is that you are tuned into their desires and both of you are satisfied in the end. There are certain things that you can’t go wrong in doing when you are trying to please her in bed. It usually doesn’t matter who the woman is. There are also a few things that no woman likes. Turn off the “adult content”, grab a notepad, and find out about the 10 things she really wants you to do in bed and 5 things she doesn’t.
15. She Wants Eye Contact
Eye contact is an integral part of intimacy and it is one of the things that gets her motor running. It doesn’t matter if you are on top of her or if she is riding you, she wants you to maintain eye contact when you are in the sack. Yes, there are a few positions that make eye contact nearly impossible unless she can do that Linda Blair spinning head thing from The Exorcist, but the rest of the time it’s a must if you want to make her happy. Eye contact helps to deepen your connection and some women get turned on by watching you watch them. It’s not like staring into your eyes will giver her the big “O”, but it’s one of those things that will help make it happen.
14. She Likes A Little Kinkiness
There are several things that are considered kinky. Getting dressed up and role playing is kinky. Introducing hand cuffs and ‘toys’ is kinky. At the extreme end of the spectrum, there’s bondage and sadomasochism. You definitely want to discuss doing those things before you try them out. Not all women are into stuff like that but most women love a playful smack on the butt or a bit of hair pulling when they are in bed. Do not mistake this to mean that you should spank her rear end until it turns cherry red or pull chunks of hair out of her scalp. Take it easy big fella!! There’s a fine line between a fun dose of kinkiness and physical abuse and you certainly don’t want to cross that line.
13. She Doesn’t Like Overaggressive Handwork
Most women love when a guy knows how to use his hands. They love it when a guy softly caresses their skin, and stimulates their nether region. An old adage says that idle hands are the devil’s workshop and this applies to the art of good love making. However, being overly aggressive with your hands can ruin everything. You may have found her G-spot but she doesn’t want to go at it like you’re trying to give her friction burn. If she wants you to be a little more vigorous with your handwork then she will let you know one way or another. So pick up on her cues.
12. She Wants you to Make Some Noise
Guys generally love it when they hear their gal moan, groan, and breathe heavy. Guess what? Most women really want to hear you do the same thing. They get turned on and tuned in when you are expressing how much you are enjoying the moment. It’s an obvious form of positive feedback. They don’t want you to just lay there in silence. Jaws was a pretty decent movie but it would have been less shocking and not as entertaining if it didn’t have such a great soundtrack. It’s the same thing when you are getting busy in bed with her. You might have some awesome moves and a great rhythm but making your own soundtrack with the heavy breathing and moaning will make the experience that much more enjoyable for her.
11. She Wants An ‘Intro’
Women love foreplay. It gets them in the mood and they find it to be a total turn on. They want you to kiss them, cuddle with them, caress them, and flirt with them. It’s true that there are times when they don’t mind skipping the foreplay like when you are enjoying a quickie in the janitor’s closet at work but when you are in bed and have the time then it is almost mandatory. Most guys just want to cut to the chase and get to it but they need to consider their partner’s desires. Remember that she is secretly grading your performance and the foreplay makes up a good chunk of your overall grade. On top of foreplay, you might want to consider the post-game show. Don’t just hop out of bed and dig into the Chinese food leftovers.
10. She Doesn’t Like Bad Hygiene
You might be a hot stuff that has all the moves and rocks every woman’s world but if you don’t pay attention to some of the other small details then you’re not going to make her very happy. Women like it when a guy is well-groomed and clean. It’s true that loads of women love the smell of their man’s sweat but there are limits. There’s a difference between a subtle musky scent and smelling like a hamper full of dirty jock straps. And let’s face it, nobody likes having to pick hairs out of their teeth. Give yourself a trim, clean yourself up, and brush your teeth if you want her to really get into it. A great big bush, body odor, and bad breathe can be an unpleasant distraction that takes her right out of the mood.
9. She Wants you to Have the Right Rhythm
Great musicians and great lovers have something in common. They both know how to keep a good beat. Both know when to change tempos and they recognize the moments where an extended jam is needed. Just as an audience will cheer the musician for pumping out a good tune, women will let you know when you have the right rhythm when you’re in bed. It doesn’t matter if it’s the speed of your tongue, hands, or hip thrusts, her body language and the sounds she makes tell you if the rhythm is right. It should be crystal-clear if she flat out tells you “I like it just like that”. When you hit the ideal tempo and she tells you to hold the beat, don’t speed up or slow down. Put it in cruise control and just keep doing what you’re doing.
8. She Wants you to Take Your Time
Unless you’re trying to get in a bit of quick action before the kids come home or you have somewhere to be in 3 minutes, s*x is not a sprint to the finish line. A lot of inexperienced guys just want to pound away and get the job done quickly. It’s as if they think that they are going to get a medal for completing the job in record time. Whoa!! Slow down, dude!! The creator played a cruel prank on women when he made it so that they take longer to reach their climax than men. The last thing she wants is for you to reach the finish line in a hurry. It takes a bit of self-discipline to take it slow but she will absolutely be grateful that you did.
7. She Doesn’t Want you to Just Lay There
Unless she specifically tells you to shut up and just lay still, then she wants you to be lively in bed. Some men can relate to how boring the deed can be with a woman who simply lays there and shows little emotion or animation. Well, women feel the same way too. They want you to get into it. They want to feel you move. They want to hear you whisper naughty things in their ear and they definitely get turned on when they see that you’re into it. It doesn’t matter if you’ve had a tiring day at work or if you’ve got a crushing hangover, she wants you to be active and work up a sweat. If you are just going to sit there like a lump on a log then it won’t be as enjoyable for her.
6. She Wants you to Pay Attention
There is a lot of communication that goes on during sex and a lot of it is unspoken. You can pick up on subtle signals like the way she moves her hips, the way she’s breathing, and the way her muscles tremble when she’s approaching her big moment. She wants you to pay attention to these signals. A simple facial expression will tell you that you’re either doing it right or you’re screwing it up. When you see her lips quiver then you know that you’re doing fine. If you notice that she’s fallen asleep then you know you’re failing miserably. You will be totally clueless if you are focusing on something else and don’t pick up on her signals. She shouldn’t have to verbalize anything if you focus on her reactions. Pay attention!!
5. She Wants Spontaneity
The majority of men and women lead hectic lives. They both work hard and they both take care of the household duties. Our schedules are full to the brim and finding time for those intimate moments can be a challenge. One of the pitfalls that couples need to avoid is sticking to a routine schedule when it comes to their romantic interludes. It’s OK if you have set aside Tuesdays and Thursdays as your designated love nights but she also wants those spontaneous moments that are loaded with passion. Suddenly taking her in the heat of the moment will delight her to no end. Sex shouldn’t necessarily be confined to the bedroom. The kitchen, the garage, and the back seat of a car are great places to show a little spontaneity.
4. She Doesn’t Want to be Crushed
When you are on top of her and you’re doing your thing, it can get physically exhausting. It’s like you’re trying to do pushups and hip thrusts at the same time. Your arms eventually begin to tire from holding your own body weight and the sweat begins to cover your body. When this happens, it’s time to get yourselves into another position. She definitely doesn’t want your full weight on her. She will have trouble breathing, feel like her ribs are being crushed, and won’t be able to move her hips freely. It will kill any momentum that you’ve gained and that is sure to leave her frustrated. When you feel that you cannot hold yourself up anymore, prepare to make a smooth transition. Don’t wait until it’s too late.
3. She Wants you to Find Her Spot
A great number of women need clitoral stimulation in order to reach the big “O”. They love penetration but it is oftentimes not enough to get them there. She wants you to play with her sensitive area but you better know what you’re doing. It’s not something that you usually go at with a hammer. It is a very sensitive spot and it needs to be treated delicately. Her reaction or lack thereof will let you know if you are doing it right but you will both know when you’ve found it. She wants you to take it slow at first and she will let you know when to speed it up and when to slow down again. Remember all that stuff about paying attention? She wants you to read her body language and respond appropriately.
2. She Wants you to be Aggressive
You would be surprised how many women appreciate a man that can take charge in the bedroom. One might think that a woman would be put off by a guy that pins her hands down or tosses her around on the bed but a lot of them really crave this sort of thing. We’re not telling you to rip their clothes off like an animal or to be abusive in any way. It’s just that they like to see their guys be a little forceful at times. Of course, if she’s not into that sort of thing then you will know pretty quickly and you’ll need to tone it down. If you are unsure about being more aggressive then discuss it with her.
1. She Doesn’t Want you to Ask Questions
Women don’t want you constantly asking them questions when you’re getting it on with them. If you have any questions then get them out of the way before you get down to business. If you aren’t sure whether or not she likes your tongue action then just pay attention to her reactions. Don’t come up and ask if she likes it or if you’re doing it right. If you’re not doing it for her then you’ll know and if you were doing it for her and you come up for air to ask an ill-timed question then you just broke the rhythm and you’ll be starting from square one. The one exception to this rule is if you’re thinking of doing the ol’ back door thing. It’s proper etiquette to ask first.
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