It’s not easy finding a partner you’re happy with, and as you get older, you probably get a lot pickier (as you should be), and the last thing you want is to settle! We tend to ignore the warning signs because we’re too lazy to start over or because we feel like we’re asking for the impossible. Here’s a tip, don’t ignore the warning signs, if you’re not happy, then you need to make a change.
Learn to keep things to yourself and not involve your friends in every problem you have, but do make sure that you have at least one person you can trust to talk to if you need any advice. The last thing you need is someone who will rile you up when you’re upset rather than calm you down and help you think clearly! Just remember to always look out for the warning signs of dating an immature boy! If you don’t know what they are, here are the 15 signs you should look out for.
15. He Puts Himself First
A good partner should be there for you, and should be able to put you first. Whether it’s something as small as having a bad day or as big as losing your job, your partner should be there for emotional support. Don’t date the guy who leaves you on your birthday to hang out with his buddies or won’t take your call when you’re upset because he’s hanging out with the boys and doesn’t want to be disturbed. Being in a relationship means compromising and being happy to do it. If you find yourself always doing things for your man but he’s never there when you need him, it’s time to let go.
14. He Plays Games
That could mean a variety of things: not answering your call so he can play hard to get, saying he’s going to sleep but staying late on social media, or “forgetting” to call and say goodnight to have you chase after him, and the list can go on forever! A real man doesn’t play games because he doesn’t have time for them. A guy who plays games isn’t ready to be in a relationship, and you don’t need that. A girl should never feel the need to chase after her man for attention, or ever feel mentally exhausted from being in a relationship.
13. He Enjoys Making You Jealous
In the words of Rihanna, “Want you to make me feel, like I’m the only girl in the world!” Every girl should feel like she’s the only one in the room in her man’s eyes. A girl who uses other women to make you jealous and get your attention definitely doesn’t deserve your time, love, or attention. You should never have to fight for your man’s love or his attention. When a man is in a committed relationship, he only has eyes for his woman and he’s secure enough to show her and only her how much he loves her.
12. You Can’t Trust Him To Go Out Without You
Your man should be able to go out for a drink or go out with his friends without getting himself into trouble, and that could mean without drinking until he blacks out or without hitting on another girl. If you find yourself worried and feeling uneasy every time he goes out without, you’re in trouble. Your man should be able to know what’s appropriate and what’s not without you having to police his every action! Be with someone who respects you in your presence and absence. The foundation of every relationship is trust, and if that’s not there, it will all come crumbling down on you eventually.
11. He Doesn’t Recognize Special Events With You
Whether it’s your dad’s retirement party, your grandmas 70th birthday party, or dinner with the family on Saturday night, if it’s important to you, it should be important to him too! If your partner leaves you to go to your best friends’ wedding alone because he just wants to be with the boys that night, that should just tell you where his priorities are. Doing things together should be fun, no matter how boring the event is, you should be there to support your partner, and making them happy should make you happy too. A girl should never have to threaten her partner or give him ultimatums so he can go to events with her.
10. He Brings You Down Rather Than Lifting You Up
Meeting your partner after a long day at work should make you feel better not feel like a burden. You need a partner who will always lift you higher, who points out all your strengths and makes you feel better about your insecurities. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been together, your man should always make you feel beautiful especially when you look and feel your worst. Don’t date someone who points out your flaws, and doesn’t bring out the best in you. If you find yourself getting more compliments from coworkers and friends more than your man, it’s time to dump him.
9. He Needs to Take Break Every Time Things Are Inconvenient
You need to be able to depend on your man, especially when things get tough. If your man keeps asking for “a break” in your relationship every time things get tough, dump him. Life isn’t easy, not everyday is all peachy and rosy; adults have bills to pay, and sometimes adulthood can get stressful so the last thing you need is a man who can’t handle life when it gets a little rough. In every relationship you should be each other’s backbone and strength when things aren’t easy. It’s pretty simple, when you love someone, you want to be with them all the time, especially when things are rough so you can make sure they are ok.
8. Always Wants Things Done His Way Only
If he needs to pick the restaurant, where you go on vacation, what day you guys go to the gym and never asks what YOU want to do, it’s time to say bye Felicia! Guess what? You’re allowed to make it about yourself and he should make it about you too. You should always take turns! The goal is always to find someone you’re really compatible with, because it sucks if all you want to do is stay home and watch movies and all he wants to do is go out and party. Nevertheless, it’s about compromise, and when you love someone, you shouldn’t feel tortured when you let them win and get their pick,
7. He Takes The Things You Do For Granted
“Thank you” and “You do so much sweetie, you’re the best” goes a very long way! A man who expects everything to be done without showing appreciation is selfish and immature. If you’re planning to have kids too he needs to understand that priorities will change, that more attention will go to the children and he should learn to help himself as well. Make sure you’re never taken advantage of and always speak up if you feel like your man is taking you for granted! You don’t need a partner who will make your life harder, you need one you can share your life with.
6. Isn’t Independent, Still Relies On Mom and Dad
If you’re dating a guy who still lives with his parents, is mooching off of them, doesn’t have a stable job and doesn’t pay bills that is definitely an immature boy. You need a partner in life who will share the responsibility with you, and if he’s still depending on mommy and daddy to pay his cell phone bill, he might just see your relationship as a burden, and he probably can’t even function as an adult which leaves you with twice the amount of work! Be with someone who at least knows how to change his own sheets and do his own laundry.
5. Doesn’t Take Responsibility
It takes a strong person to apologize, admit he is wrong, or take responsibility for hurtful or irresponsible actions. If your man sees that you’re always wrong and he is perfect, it probably won’t work out. We all make mistakes and you might want to be with someone who is secure and mature enough to recognize his shortcomings and want to make up for them rather than push all the blame on you! The way you do one thing, is the way you do everything, so if he can’t take responsibility for his actions he won’t go far in life.
4. He Always Has To Win Arguments Or Have The Last Word
It feels good to know that you’re right, or to “win” an argument, but what does that really mean? If are with someone who would rather “win” the argument than solve the issue and work on your problems, he’s an immature one who has a lot of growing up to do. Having to win means you have a huge ego that will get in the way of your relationship. You know what they say, “the “ego” is the only requirement to destroy any relationship, so be the bigger person skip the “e” and let it “go.”” That doesn’t mean you should be you should be dormat either, but find the balance that works for both of you.
3. He Disappears On You (Emotionally OR Physically)
If a man disappears for hours at a time or even one day, run! In a relationship you need to be able to depend on your partner. Ask yourself this, if you were in jail and had one phone call to make, would you call your partner? If you’re answer is no because they probably wouldn’t answer then you don’t need someone like that in your life. “Disappearing” doesn’t necessarily mean physically, it can mean emotionally as well. Someone who just wants to check out and sulk for days because he can’t emotionally handle life, isn’t going to be there when things get tough.
2. He Is Extremely Indecisive
You need a partner who knows what he wants, and an indecisive partner can bring can cause more confusion in your life. If he’s indecisive because he doesn’t care it’s even worse. Gathering the facts and making a decision takes mental strength, and if he doesn’t care, you’re clearly not on his list of priorities. Everyday you have to make decisions, sometimes big ones and sometimes small ones and and as you get older, the decisions get harder and more permanent; where to live, how many kids to have, small or big wedding, and so so many more.
1. He Complains Too Much And Always Feels Defeated
There is nothing sexier than a man who can handle himself. The biggest turnoff is a man who whines about everything, from having to wake up early to go to work, to paying bills, to traffic, to oh so many other things! The last thing you need is a “debbie downer” in your life who sees everything as an obstacle and not a solution. Be with someone who makes you aim higher and be a better person, rather than bring you down because he can’t deal with life. Who your surround yourself with is very important and can affect your mood and where you end up in life.
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