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20 Of The Most Ridiculous Inventions Ever Made

Tech
20 Of The Most Ridiculous Inventions Ever Made

via: amazon.com

In modern life, there seems to be a major emphasis on getting rich. The problem is, a lot of things tend to get in the way of that possibility. We don’t start our lives on an even playing field so sometimes the things that would help us achieve said wealth is just out of reach. For instance, higher education tends to yield larger paychecks, but that’s not in the cards for everybody. Some of us even seem to be blessed with or learn a useful skill-set but they aren’t the kind of skill-sets that yield millions of dollars. Because of this, a lot of people tend to think of getting rich in terms of a fluke or a big break. These kinds of flukes could be described as getting an inheritance from a long lost uncle, getting famous, winning the lottery, or inventing the next big item that everybody wants or needs but they just haven’t realized it yet.

This drive to get rich by inventing the next big thing has been responsible for a great many things that some of us probably wouldn’t want to live without. On the other side of that coin, it’s also responsible for some items that are just a bit…odd.

Keep reading to take a look at some of those oddities now.

20. The Selfie Stick

via: cultofmac.com

The selfie-stick is actually a great idea when you get right down to it. You can get wider shots of yourself with more friends, or even capture a famous or historical landmark in the background of your shot. You also don’t have to ask a stranger to take a picture of you and your friends or family. Fifteen years ago, said stranger could possibly run off with your camera. These days, they could be running off with a smartphone that contains many details to your entire identity. You have to be a little more careful with your smartphone than a camera.

All the good things about the selfie-stick being said…nobody has ever looked cool using one. Nobody. Ever.

19. The Snot Sucker

via: amazon.com

If you don’t have children, this undoubtedly seems like the most disgusting contraption on the face of the Earth. Imagine your child’s head is a gas tank in your car and the snot sucker is a siphon. Just like you would with an automobile, you stick one end of the tube into the baby’s nose, put your lips on the other end, and start sucking the snot straight out of your child’s face. If you’re lucky, you can get your lips off the tube before all the delicious, warm snot makes it down your throat.

All joking aside, parents actually swear by this. As a known user put it, “You’ll do anything if it means getting them to sleep and getting a little sleep yourself.”

18. Dog Nail Polish

via: warrenlondon.com

No, this is not simply the practice of fancying up the toenails of your pets with your own nail polish. This is an actual product, different from the nail polish we humans use, specifically marketed as a product for the pets of people with too much money and not enough hobbies. The product comes in a few forms, the more popular version being a pen that goes on and dries very quickly, similar to a marker with a stronger coating ability.

The question here isn’t so much who invented it and why, but who actually asked for nail polish for animals? Had the human race been sitting around for decades wondering why someone had yet to develop a nail polish for dogs? Were people in the late ’60s and early ’70s sitting around saying, “They can put a man on the moon, but they can’t make a nail polish that’s safe for my dog!”

17. The Snuggie

via: nymag.com

A lot of people swear by the Snuggie. Snuggie lovers are practically a cult, which is pretty hilarious since the Snuggie makes the wearer look like a cult member. Just because people like an invention and it serves a useful purpose doesn’t mean it isn’t ridiculous.

Making the wearer look like a cult member isn’t the only thing odd about the Snuggie. The real funny thing about the Snuggie is we already had two products that served the same purpose. The first being blankets.

“But it’s difficult to stay covered up and use your hands for something like reading or drinking a cup of tea! It’s all about the sleeves!” a Snuggie advocate might say.

What’s the second thing? Put a Snuggie on backwards and what do you have?

A robe.

16. The Baby Mop

via: nydailynews.com

The baby mop might actually be the greatest invention of all time. That being said, that doesn’t mean the concept and look isn’t a bit ridiculous.

It actually solves what could be a major problem. If you have a baby and your house has mainly hard floors, the baby mop pajamas offer a little extra padding on the child’s clothing to move around with a bit of ease and less chance of injury. Then of course you have the added bonus of having a living dust mop in your house. Let’s see a Roomba do that!

Oh. A Roomba does do that. Well let’s see a Roomba do that for only thirty dollars!

15. The Travel Pillow

via: travelandleisure.com

While the travel pillow is designed perfectly for the cramped seating in the coach section of passenger jets and planes, it seems a little…anti-social?

People already complain that this generation has their heads buried in the their phones. They claim this keeps them from meeting new people and seeing new things. The thing is, most people are buried in their smartphones these days and it doesn’t strike most of us as odd anymore. Look at this thing though! How would you feel if you were on your flight, took your seat, greeted the person sitting next to you with a kindly “Hello”, and then they whipped this monstrosity out and buried their face in it?

14. Power Scissors

via: armorco.com

Not only do electric scissors make cutting paper or fabric a breeze, but they serve an even greater purpose:

They double as a trophy for the “laziest human being in the world” award. If you have a lazy person in your life, make their day with a pair of these to brighten their day. Wait…are electronic scissors still considered a “pair” of scissors or does turning them into a machine make them a single object?

To be fair, these are probably great for someone with arthritis or limited hand movement. At the same time, you know more perfectly capable people have purchased electric scissors than those with issues that would justify the product.

13. Motorized Lollipops

via: pinterest.com

When I said electric scissors doubles as a trophy for “the laziest person in the world” I had forgotten about self-spinning lollipops.

You used to see these around with a bit more frequency but it looks like the idea didn’t quite catch on like the creators thought they might.

Seriously. An excuse could be made for electric scissors, but who needs a self-spinning lollipop? Do people even spin their lollipops? Most people I know just dived right in – especially if it was a Charms Blow-Pop. Who in their right mind was going to wait that long to get to the gum?

12. Dog Boots

via: alldogboots.com

Okay. I know making our pets look like people is always entertaining, but at the end of the day you’re supposed to take your ugly Hawaiian shirt off of Biscuit and hide it in the back of the closet where all Hawaiian shirts belong.

Your dog’s feet are sort of made for walking outside. You might be able to argue that it keeps their feet clean so they don’t track mud and dirt through the house, but how comfortable does anyone think the dog really is?

What we need to invent is something that translates a dog’s thoughts into human speech so they can finally tell us how much they hate stuff like this.

11. The Pour Thing

via: youtube.com

Back in the ’90s there weren’t hundreds of channels that all offered programming twenty-four hours a day. Most channels would go off the air and play the national anthem or project a row of multi-colored bars. Channels that didn’t simply stop airing programming generally aired infomercials.

Infomercials were the birthplace of inventions like The Pour Thing. They would typically make a relatively easy task like pouring a jug of juice or a bottle of soda seem like a life ending ordeal. The actors in these commercials would open the jug and literally rip the jug in half, or open a soda and every last drop would violently spray from it for minutes.

The Pour Thing comes in a range of sizes. Getting additional items in different sizes was the infomercial’s major selling point.

10. The Boyfriend Pillow

via: amazon.com

This one is a little more sad than ridiculous. It’s pretty much a regular pillow with an arm on the side to cradle the user. Instead of a case it uses a men’s dress shirt to further authenticate the feel of a real man.

I could see someone purchasing an item like this for a friend as a gag gift. If I were to ever meet someone that actually had one of these, and used it for its actual purpose, I’d probably cry.

I suppose there are some other reasons people use them. If your husband travels a lot for work, this might help deal with the loneliness…

Wait. Nope. It’s still just half a torso. That’s weird.

9. Retro Telephone Hand-Set

via: payphoneoutlet.com

The retro telephone hand-set is the premier gift for that special curmudgeon in your life that remains resistant to change. Even if you had trouble getting used to the size and shape of a smart phone…where do you put this thing?

The product itself says the phone is great for the home and office so perhaps it isn’t meant to be taken around on the go, but if you have to

8. Poo-Pourri

via: youtube.com

This is actually a great invention and it does seem to work. The major issue with other sprays is once you spray them they just mist through the air and blend in with, well, we’ll just call it the smell you’ve already left behind.

The trick with Poo Pourri is it’s designed to be sprayed first, dampening “the smell of things to come” in the first place. The only thing really ridiculous about it are the commercials on television and the Internet. Then there is also that name. Whoever landed on that is a genius.

7. Corn Kerneler

via: amazon.in

Maybe I haven’t done enough traveling in my day. I’ve only been to two different countries so I’m hardly an expert on how things work in other places on Spaceship Earth, but is canned corn really hard to come by in other countries? If you can buy it, is it absurdly expensive? The last time I checked I could get a can of corn for under a buck. That isn’t an exclusive luxury to where I live, is it?

If you don’t like corn on the cob, why are you buying it? It seems like not buying something would be easier than buying something.

6. PetSafe Bolt

via: chewy.com

What’s the perfect gift for someone who bought or adopted a new kitten or cat but then decided it was going to be too time consuming to bother with? Easy! The PetSafe Bolt.

All you have to do is set the PetSafe Bolt in the middle of the floor and the Bolt will randomly wave around a laser pointer for you. Now you can neglect your pets and use that extra time to buy other products that help you shirk your responsibilities and defeat the purpose of having a pet. Maybe you can use your new found free-time to invent a product that goes and buys you another PetSafe Bolt when the other one breaks!

5. Squatty Potty

via: adweek.com

While the concept behind the Squatty Potty seems to be backed by actual facts and research (basically, we’ve been pooping wrong), you can’t deny it may have one of the silliest product names and by far the silliest commercial of all time.

The ads feature a “Prince Charming” type hanging with a unicorn struggling to go to the bathroom. When the unicorn is given the Squatty Potty, it begins using the bathroom more correctly, and begins dispensing what appears to be rainbow sherbet out of its back end.

The product itself is supposed to allow to do your business with the correct posture, but at the end of the day, the Squatty Potty is just a step stool.

4. Riding Potty Chair

via: pottytrainingconcepts.com

If your toddler is the head of a Fortune 500 company and is constantly on the go, then they absolutely need this time saver! No more wasted minutes walking all the way to the bathroom when they can just stay permanently fixed to a potty/scooter hybrid. The best part about the Potty Scotty (or Potty Patty for the ladies) is it prepares your child for those tween years when they’re still trying to figure out how to pee while still riding their bike. Peeing on the go is a hard skill to master and there is product that trains the little ones early.

Better hope it doesn’t tip over while they’re scooting around the house…

3. Snowball Maker

via: flickr.com

If you’re this worried about getting your gloves wet, why are you even out in the snow? Is the snowball maker going to throw them too? Does this make the snowball more aerodynamic? Is it an aesthetic thing? Why do they have to be perfect spheres?

On the other hand, a perfect snowball maker would make it a lot easier to hide the occasional rock. It’s also a more sanitary way of making a yellow snowball. Maybe they’re on to something here…

Just kidding. In all seriousness, by the time you’ve used this to prep your snowballs, little Danny from down the block has just pelted you with about twenty “imperfect” snowballs – and we bet they still hurt without being perfect spheres.

2. Doggles

via: en.wikipedia.org

While someone’s heart was in the right place when these were being developed, how many dogs do you know that love when you adorn them with a bunch of clunky things? There’s dogs that don’t even like wearing their flea collars let alone having sunglasses over their eyes. It’s nice someone was worried about the sun or blowing debris, but dogs seem to be able to handle themselves when it comes to braving the elements.

Oddly enough, it looks like something a dog would fight to get out off, but apparently Doggles have sold amazingly well. The ridiculous part about this invention is such a simple concept didn’t happen a lot sooner.

1. Pizza Baker

via: everafterguide.com

Most of us look at the available counter-top space in our kitchens and the first thing we think is, “Man. There is just too much counter space. How can I waste some of this counter space? Better yet, how can I waste money on something I already have?”

If this is you, you need a pizza baker. It should take up an entire counter and it can make pizzas, just like your oven. It can also make delicious baked treats, just like your oven. Wait. No. No it can’t. It just makes pizzas. Only pizzas. That thing your oven can already do.

Aha! Maybe your oven is broken and you really want a pizza!

You should probably save that money and put it towards a new oven.

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