Fame is one of those highly elusive qualities that we as humans seem to desire (some of us anyway… I’d rather have lots of money and be completely unknown. It keeps the phoney investors from calling me on the phone for my cash). Sometimes fame is something well deserved, like a business entrepreneur who changes the world, like Mark Zuckerberg did with Facebook, or Bill Gates with Microsoft. Some are famous for being talented in specific fields, like Daniel Day Lewis and Christian Bale in their acting careers. Others for their physical ability like Mike Tyson for boxing. The list goes on and on and on for any number of reasons.
Of course, just being really good at something doesn’t necessarily guarantee fame. Anyone know Norman Borlaug? He is the father of the Green Revolution and changed agriculture so much that it is barely recognizable today… he also saved over 1 BILLION people from famine and at least 200 million people from death from starvation. Yet he is barely known outside a few circles. Another famous individual is Dennis Ritchie, the creator of the C programming language, a language so important to computing that the world of computers today would be unrecognizable without it. We all know Steve Jobs, the founder of Apple and the guy who turned it into one of the most valuable brands in the world today. But Steve would never have been able to get ANY of his gadgets off the ground if it wasn’t for Dennis. Odd we remember Steve, but not the man who made Steve possible.
So now we get to the really weird part of the article… those who are famous for nothing. This is something that we don’t fully understand about how it works… in the past we all knew someone who did something ridicules and s/he ended up getting known for said ridiculous deed. But how does that work on a global scale? How do these people not only get famous when their only talent is… well… having their names known. This is a byproduct of modern TV shows and tabloid magazines. By TV show I mean reality TV, since scripted stuff actually requires something called talent and not just throwing things and yelling profanity while getting drunk… I don’t know, I never watched reality TV.
Anyway, without further ado, here is a list of 15 attractive women who aren’t famous for anything else.
25. Paris Hilton
This is almost cheating. Even 13 years after her debut as a superbly famous hot young woman who is famous for… well… releasing a sex tape, getting into a bunch of drunk shenanigans, and being ripped apart by none other than South Park, it’s still amazing to think just WHAT exactly Paris Hilton has done other than being famous for being famous… and being an heiress to the Hilton hotel chain, and rejecting countless highly wealthy suitors. I honestly have no idea, and I wonder what the next 10 years will bring after Paris turns 40 or even 50. Will she still be famous for being famous? No… chances are likely she’ll be famous for having once been famous for being famous…
24. Angela and Vanessa Simmons
So now we have the two for one special. Angela and Vanessa Simmons used their daddy’s reality TV series Run’s House as a springboard to fame so they could start their own fashion line. This actually succeeded despite them having no real talent at all. In fact, Angela just kept dating a variety of people to get even more fame by association before she had to give that up when, in September of 2016, she gave birth to a baby boy and got engaged to Sutton Joseph Tennyson.
Vanessa had a similar spate when she had a few cameos and dated the son of an actor and probably got enough of it when she decided to have a baby girl. Hey, at least their kids are cousins now… or have them. I don’t know what to say.
23. Kimberly Stewart
Angela and Vanessa Simmons’s only claim to fame (and their ability to obtain it) was that they were the daughters of someone famous. Kimberly is pretty much an extension of that. Being born to Rod Stewart, an iconic British rock star, means that you probably don’t even have to be especially hot to get a role in anything, or talented for that matter. In fact, she experimented with acting, modelling, music, and (of course), reality TV before she decided to call it quits, get married, and have a child. Wait… no she didn’t get married, she had that kid without marriage. Not judging, but why are people so quick to do that without some kind of commitment? Ahh never mind.
22. Nicole Richie
Another daughter of a famous singer. Like Kimberly Stewart above, she is the daughter of Lionel Richie, but using her father’s fame as a launching pad is not the only thing that she had going for her. She is double famous for being famous. The reality TV show that she got from her father (because of course it is reality TV) had Paris Hilton on it, another famous-for-being-famous individual. Like the Simmons, she also had her own fashion line (why always fashion?) and went the exact same route as the ladies above by hooking up with someone and having some cute babies. She’s actually been trying to avoid the limelight now since she figured she already got her 15 minutes of fame out of her system.
21. Teresa Giudice
Of all the Real Housewives out there, she is probably the most controversial. Beyond the show, Giudice is married to Juicy Joe, and involved with any controversy that comes anywhere near her place of residence. She is currently in prison for fraud, she has assaulted people, flipped tables at them, and apparently loves to drink. She also says the wrong things when she drinks sometimes and has published a book about the subject which you can pick up. How good is it? I don’t know… I prefer to invent my own cocktails and pretend I’m rich and famous to my cat, or something.
20. Kristin Cavallari
Kristen Cavallari is a girl who’s main advantage is a pretty face… and being born rich in the midst of Orange County, California, one of the most famous cities in the US (seriously, it’s been featured in so many movies and TV shows that people who do visit there in real life have a massive feeling of déjà vu). This allowed her to practically ease her way into the spotlight by driving nice cars and throwing huge parties at her parents’ expense. Her other claims to fame are being married to Jay Cutler, a former NFL quarterback for the Chicago Bears, and having starred in Laguna Beach and The Hills, a pair of reality TV shows (because of course they are).
19. Kelly Osbourne
OK, so this one might be a little unfair, since Kelly has actually gone on to make herself into a style icon and TV personality. She has done charity work and did quite a bit of other cool stuff, meaning she does have talent. In fact, it’s hard to believe that at one point it seemed like she WOULD have been famous for being famous. As the daughter of the British rock star, Ozzy Osbourne, she debuted in the 2002 reality TV show (is anyone playing a drinking game? If so, take a sip of beer every time you read the word ‘reality tv’ in this article, trust me, you’ll be smashed before it’s over) and it was a highly successful show. She should have just gone on partying and drinking and she would have more properly belonged on this list. But instead she is here as a bit of a wildcard since she kinda is famous for more than that.
18. Audrina Patridge
Just like Kristen Cavallari, Audrina has starred in The Hills which showcased her to the world for the first time, before she tried to reignite her 15 minutes of fame through shows like Audrina (named after her so you will absolutely know that she’s the star!) and acted in horror movies like Sorority Row and Into the Blue 2: The Reef, both of which bombed critically. She even starred in Scary Movie 5 which we know has ceased to be a parody of horror movies and has become a parody of itself. Her role in the film was so big that they cut out all of her scenes. Like most of them, she has cooled down now that she has a kid, but she’s still making the occasional appearance on TV
17. Lauren Conrad
Yet another Laguna Beach veteran who is the one who started The Hills TV show (seriously, those two shows include a lot of people from this list). Being the daughter of two wealthy architect parents, she’s actually on the younger end of the people here since she is also a pioneer in getting famous for being famous almost at the same time as Paris Hilton did. It’s also amazing how much of a phenomenon she became with Salon describing her as one of the dullest major characters in reality television history. This is proof that sometimes being pretty is all you need to get you through life.
16. Nicky Hilton
Some people are famous for being famous, but then there’s Nicky Hilton. She is not famous for being famous, not for being outrageous (she’s actually quite intelligent and too sensible to do stuff like that), but she simply got too caught up with her elder sister, who you might know as Paris Hilton. Simply put, sometimes when a relative like that gets too notorious, their notoriety will rub off on you whether you like it or not. At least this time she didn’t deliberately exploit her reputation for something more. She did have some interesting marriage choices, but beyond that she’s guilty of nothing more than being Paris’s sister.
15. Amber Rose
Kanye West is a man with a really weird personality. He’s notorious for his arrogance and extreme high self-esteem. That being said, Amber Rose was his wife, and probably the two personalities clashed together quite well into a perfect storm of awesomeness that allowed her to rise to the spotlight. Well… not really, she was in the spotlight in 2008 when she was a backup dancer in a music video “What Them Girls Like.” It wasn’t long before the ex-stripper and Kanye got together for a brief bit, and then their divorce gave her the notoriety needed to get into modelling, which is what she does now.
14. Kim Kardashian
You knew she was coming. Well then, Kimberly Kardashian really burst onto the scene nearly 10 years ago when she walked backwards into a room and showed the world her assets. OK, so that was a bit crass, but it’s still exactly what happened. I can’t for the life of me ever understand why Kim became so famous and for what… Keeping Up with the Kardashians? Yes, it seems like your typical reality TV show, but I still can’t put my finger on it. Either way, getting a photograph of Kim that doesn’t show off what a massive rear end or gazookas she’s got is a hard thing to find objectively.
13. Khloe Kardashian
So Khloe Kardashian is Kim Kardashian’s younger sister and is subsequently not as well known, but while she might have her own little career as a TV/radio personality and of course is married to an NBA player, she would be completely unknown if it wasn’t for her bigger sister. It’s one of those things that younger siblings always have to contend with, just being second banana to her big sister. I wonder if she got a lot of noogies from Kim when she was growing up. Or do girls even noogie each other like boys? I don’t know, I need to talk to more girls…
12. Kourtney Kardashian
OK I promise, this is going to be the last Kardashian on the list. They’re just too easy anyway. As the eldest of the Kardashian clan, and probably the reason why Kim and the rest became so well known, Kourtney first appeared on reality TV in 2005 on the series Filthy Rich: Cattle Drive in which she raised money for charity. Like many famous-for-being-famous people, her career really got off the ground when a sex tape emerged in 2007 that she had recorded in 2003 and this apparently got them commissioned for the Kardashians series. Normally this results in massive embarrassment, not a huge career boost, but we’re used to that by now.
11. Heidi Montag
Heidi, along with her husband Spencer Pratt, are known primarily for what a public annoyance they are. So if real life was a Saturday morning cartoon, she would play the part of the petty villain who annoys the main characters over and over during the course of an episode. Of course that’s exactly what her role was on the reality TV show The Hills… There’s that show again. Did that show produce most of this list or what? Anyway, to show off how deep she is after the show, she released a music album called Superficial… yeah, take from that what you will.
10. Casey Johnson
So remember how Paris Hilton is the heiress to a huge hotel chain? Well what happens when you get the great-great-granddaughter of a major company founder? In this case, of Robert Wood Johnson, the founder of Johnson & Johnson… You get tragedy in this case.
I’m not going to make many jokes about her, she was actually pretty notorious already in the late 90s when she got a lot of harassment from paparazzi for her party girl lifestyle, and she even got a movie made in 2003 called Born Rich. She had the opportunity to star next to Nicky Hilton in The Simple Life but she declined it and then greatly regretted it. The sad part about this is that she didn’t live too long after. She passed away in 2010 from diabetic ketoacidosis. She was diagnosed with type one diabetes at eight years old. She was barely 30.
9. La Toya Jackson
La Toya Jackson is Michael Jackson’s elder sister. That makes her the oldest still living person on this list. It must be really hard to be a sibling to one of the greatest musical performers to have ever lived, but she got a little bit less than that… she sadly didn’t get much fame even when she began her career back in the 80s. From what I see, she wasn’t even part of the original Jackson 5 in the 70s. She does have her own music career, and it seems to be going OK, but whenever her name is spoken, I’m sure the only thing that people hear is the Jackson part and forget about the rest…
8. Brooke Hogan
Brooke Hogan is the daughter of a man called Terry Bollea… otherwise known as Hulk Hogan (yes, his real name is Terry Bollea, and her real name is Brooke Bollea, too). She took up his nickname otherwise no one would know who she was or where she came from. Brooke has dabbled in everything from reality TV to music… and yes, even got into the ring in the mid-2000s to showcase that she can be body slammed like the rest of us. Another case of someone famous because of the connections they had with one of the biggest celebrities still alive.
7. Kim Zolciak
Kim is totally real. I mean real by the fact that she is one of the cast of The Real Housewives of Atlanta. You can’t get any more real than that. She has also tried to dabble in country music from 2008 to 2012 when she released three albums… I mean singles, only one of which actually got any level of fame. She basically didn’t get too far in her acting career and even lost custody of her two daughters to her ex-husband. I’m not sure what happened, but her daughters apparently changed their surnames to their father’s despite them originally using their mother’s. She also suffered a stroke in 2015 that probably is going to hinder her attempts at being famous for anything other than a short stint in a reality TV show.
6. Tila Tequila
So Tila Tequila sounds like she might be from Latina America, but no… she’s from Singapore, making her the only ethnically Chinese person on this list. She rose to prominence due to provocative photos she posted online… on MySpace. Do you remember MySpace? No… good! But in all seriousness, in the days before the near monopoly of social media, MySpace was a serious contender up until 2008 when it fell by the wayside and became what it is now.
That being said, someone saw her on that page and put her on VH1 reality show Shot of Love before she started to dabble in music and… well, I guess that’s it. Just plain old dabbling. Riveting cause of fame! Let’s keep calm and carry on.
5. Rakhi Sawant
So, we’ve spent so much time with North American people… actually I don’t think there’s a single person on this list that isn’t in the United States. There must be people outside of the US who are just as famous for being famous and doing outrageous things. Well, look no further than Rakhi Sawant. She is an Indian dancer and model who seems to never be out of the Indian newspapers for her comments and actions that always seem to spark outrage in India. I didn’t look up much of what she did, but she seems to be a combination of Paris Hilton and Teresa Giudice rolled into one.
Snooki was a part of the main cast of the The Jersey Shore, which was considered to be the absolute height of low-brow television and vulgarity, where she would get drunk and get into some massive shenanigans which included harassing a man to the point where he punched her on the face. An interview with David Letterman (or was it Conan O’Brien? I keep forgetting) revealed that she practically had to keep up her drinking habit by drinking several gin cocktails as early as the morning… every morning.
She seems to have given up this image and is trying to become more wholesome. Especially since she is a mother now… I wonder what’ll happen when her kids grow up and start to Google images of her. That’s going to be an amazing conversation!
3. Farrah Abraham
So I mentioned that a lot of these ladies ended their careers when they got pregnant and had kids (kids have a tendency of taking over your entire life). In this case, it’s actually how she started out. She first made her debut on the show 16 and Pregnant where she showed up pregnant and her boyfriend was killed in a car accident. That’s one hell of a way to get famous for nothing, and it got even weirder when she released a sex tape in 2013 of her and everyone else just immediately threw her back into the spotlight. It seems like every time she slips away from the spotlight, a little slip of her dress brings her right back!
2. Courtney Stodden
Courtney Stodden is someone who is very attractive. I mean that in an “adult star” sense. But she didn’t get famous in porn… that would be too conventional. She got famous when, in 2011, she married actor Doug Hutchison. What’s the big deal you might ask? Well, she was 16 at the time, and Doug was 50. Now normally that would make you wonder if it was even legal (age of consent and age of marriage can be different, but come on… 34 years difference?). She split with her mother over ‘creative differences’ in 2015 when she ceased to be her manager. I won’t progress any further since I’m still thinking about that massive age difference between her and her husband. Fun fact: as of the writing of this article, Wikipedia says that she divorced him in September of 2017… It is barely June for Pete’s sake! Does Wikipedia tell the future now?
1. Zsa Zsa Gabor
And here we are, at last, with the very last entry. Last does not mean least. In fact, Zsa Zsa Gabor might have passed away at the ripe old age of 99 in 2016. While we might think she was a big time actor back in the 1960s or so, that really wasn’t true. She did have cameos in some TV shows and movies, but her claim to fame was more than likely her outrageous behavior and her ability to charm her way out of anything, be it a bad divorce settlement (and she has some REALLY good divorce settlements – in fact, she holds the world record for most number of marriages annulled) or a speeding ticket. The other thing that was so amazing about her was that she did this at a time before reality TV and when being an outrageous individual was actually looked down upon. Meaning she actually was talented, unlike the previous people on this list.
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